Annotated 21-21
Phil messed up here. Or did he?
That last “I love you” was supposed to be E-Merl’s, not Rachel’s. I wrote it that way in the script, Phil misread it and lettered it the other way. I was upset by the mistake and more upset by Phil’s refusal to correct it: he did admit he’d done it wrong, but felt like we should just roll with it.
Was he right? These days I go back and forth. Rachel beating E-Merl to the punch is definitely less expected, which gives the scene more energy, and though she’s clearly guiding the kiss in panel 5, making her not silent in panel 4 gives her a hair more agency. On the other hand, E-Merl finding the right words in the right moment would mean a lot to those of us who’ve struggled to say something important (Rachel has considerably less awkwardness to overcome). Annnd I WROTE IT THAT WAY, THE WAY I WROTE IT STILL FEELS RIGHT, DAMMIT
I suspect most of y’all never even considered an alternative to what you see here, and even in my widest pendulum swings, I’ll concede this version “works.” But that’s the problem with seeing the sausage being made–or making it yourself, I guess–sometimes your feels about the behind-the-scenes stuff gets in the way.
There is only one solution, they both say it at the same time. Imbrace your inner rom-com, give in to the cheese.
There we have it. I was going to view it as a Schrödinger’s Love Confession, but both is good.
Finally, they kiss!
The only issue I have with it is I don’t think simply blurting “I love you” works for Rachel. I think something more like, “You love me. (next panel, but with the speech bubble connected back to panel 4) I love you, too,” would have worked better for her.
I completely forgot that they kissed!
An “I love you too” would have been better from her.
LOL! I didn’t realize it were Rachel’s words until today! For the whole run of the comic I just took it as Emerl last words…
Same here. In had to double check it, because I would have sworn that E-Merl said it.
Ditto. (This time at least. I don’t remember if I noticed the first time around.)
Fourthed. It just flows that way.
Fifthed. I’m sure it happened to a lot of people.
I too prefer it to be E-Merls words. There is something I can’t define, because I know the romantic cut off works sometimes. I don’t think it works here. It’s stealing E- Merl’s thunder. It’s like seeing someone trying to push a large rock over a hill, and then swooping in and finishing it right before the last push.
It’s a reaffirmation of E-Merls whimpyness rather than the emotionally fraught confession it was set up to be.
And because the audience feels the intent, I’d think that many registered it as E-Merl speaking dispite visual evidence.
And i actually see these being HER words better than E-Merl’s, because it looks proper when he’s giving the fat of the speech and she slims out the most important words. That way is much more like them.
C-C-C-Combo breakerrrr! Ha.
It works as is, but I agree it probably would have been better from E-Merl to show some character growth.
Colours form a nice contrast with those of the previous page. Two couples, each trapped in their own pocket, different interactions, different outcomes.
Shut off the circlet? What circlet? Nobody’s wearing a circlet!
Isn’t this orb created from his ring?
WHAT IS THIS!
A CIRCLET FOR ANTS?!
I’m gonna need you to delete this post, sir. I can’t stop laughing every time I scroll down here, it’s almost a health hazard.
http://guildedage.net/comic/annotated-12-10/
So… a circlet can be a ring?
I picked up English through my exposure to video games as a kid and in these a circlet is usually worn in the head. Of course this mean I can easily be totally off.
You’re not totally off; a circlet is most often a headpiece, but the word can also mean any ring-shaped object. E-Merl doesn’t use fancy words much, but he likes that his talismans have fancy names. One could argue it makes them more awe-inspiring and therefore more magical.
I prefer this way because the other would feel as if he uses the urgency of the moment to push the kiss upon her whether it’s a reciprocated emotion or not. I understand your desire to hew to your original idea, but I think he accidentally improved upon it.
It’s still a terrific moment.
Eh. Rach’s hand behind Emerl’s head ought to dispel any suspicion that he forced her into a kiss she didn’t also want.