Annotated 37-3
Yikes. Big yikes. See what I meant yesterday? Those fungus-pink eyes, and that normally styled but now slightly ragged hair… when Syr’Nj says later in this chapter that she “can’t allow herself to start crying,” I think she’s speaking broadly, as in “I can’t let myself keep crying in public.” She’s been scream-weeping recently and is not doing a great job of hiding it.
Panel 4: DOUBLE YIKES. Gravedust, you are damn lucky that Bandit is there to soak up most of Syr’Nj’s anger, because telling a possible widow who’s begging you to save her husband “This is just how it was meant to be, the cosmos works in mysterious ways” is a really good way to find out if that anger can reach Frigg-like proportions.
And yet, in spite of it all, she somehow manages to make a really solid philosophical argument that takes Gravedust’s faith 100% into account. Though he’s startled, he indeed does have to respect it. She has to maintain her reason here. Byron’s (return to) life may depend on it.
Yeah… Kinda reminds of certain Khan who replied to certain Pope that no, they would not stop from pillaging and looting their way to them, ‘cose surely if he was to be stoppped, Pope’s God would do that and that he was allowed to continue just proved that God wanted them to be destroyed…
And Syr’Nj argument is pretty much “They made an exception. So that’s the new norm now, right?” Not to mention that last one was heavily loaded question of does Gravedust want her to “respect” his beliefs by respecting hers first…
Granted, it’s VERY easy to see where she’s coming with this. It’s the bargaining moment.
Still would be cruel enough to answer as Gravedust that “I will meditate on it and ask the Mystics. But I will not do so just because you want him back.” :D
Would it be cruel, tho? Gravedust is getting pretty heavily manipulated here. He completely understand’s Syr’nj’s pain, but he’s still coming off the witnessing of Rachel’s obliteration. Resurrecting Byron would already be a violation of his oaths and beliefs, like he said and as he’s consistently held. Now it would also imply that Byron is somehow worthy in a way none of the other fallen Peacemakers, friends, guildmembers, or soldiers are. And Syr’nj is using that as the lever to throw him over. And Bandit’s the stone getting thrown under that lever.
She has no idea of the truth. She hasn’t bothered to apply any of her lofty rhetoric about investigation in the face of uncertain data to the Bandit situation. She has come down singularly in favor of her own judgement and she will not be stopped.
She’s not more forceful in response to Gravedust here because her rationality is telling her he’s her only hope. Only he can use the resurrection power, so it has to be ruthless persuasion. If instead his power to resurrect were a potion phial tagged “Never ever use – morally wrong” and kept locked in a safe, you can be sure she would not have even bothered to consult him, here. She’d have gone straight for the safe hours ago, and fuck Gravedust’s lofty beliefs.
I’m sorry, but it’s just so hypocritical. Shame on Syr’nj.
(although, as a reader, lover of strongly written characters, and a Byron fan – thank you Syr’nj 😄🍿😋)
Except like Syr’nj said, she’s got direct empirical evidence in her own continued existence that Gravedust’s oaths have an exception, and Byron was previously classified as one of them. “The cosmos itself” decided Byron was more worthy. Maybe Gravedust has been trying to ignore the implications of that, but now he has to look it in the face.
Look it in the face, by Syr’nj, who is setting that reveal up on purpose to drive him to that very act .
Would anyone protest Gravy being inconsistent if he had learned of Byron’s death and made the decision to rez him on his own?
As for the last time – Gravy was acting under divine instruction, not Syr’nj’s. Trying to logic him into assuming the will of the divine is a bit presumptuous, no?
I don’t want to get too much more into this than I already have, but I do think it’s worth drawing a distinction here: Syr’Nj isn’t trying to make Gravedust assume the will of the divine. She’s trying to make him not assume it, but rather to ask it, which is a very different thing. This is certainly not an ideal interaction from her—-the way she bitterly mocks him in panel 4 is proof enough of that—-but this is distinct from the way she buttonholed him about resurrecting her father, when her trauma was far fresher and her understanding of Gravedust was shallower.
Fair. If the mystics came back and were all like “nope,” would she relent?
I mean you’re half the authoring team so I’m being a bit rhetorical 😄 but I suspect that if that happened, Syr’nj might have come to resent Gravedust almost as much as Bandit. I do not read her as acting honorably here, which was my main point.
There is no uncertain data where Bandit is concerned.
Syr’nj knows is that Byron was arrogant and stupid enough to walk into a trap of his own volition, and the person who was in charge of the mission, after being unable to prevent the trap being sprung, took exceptional pleasure in ensuring Byron’s death. Bandit — as far as we know at this point — has done nothing to exhibit remorse nor regret, made no mention that he was the agent of infection, or there was any sort of ‘for the good of those still living at the time.
As you just said yourself, Bandit was the field leader but got saddled with Byron, who walked into the trap. Calling her incompetent is absolutely not warranted. Nobody in her place could have done better (well, except a small army of medics with anti-berzerk serum …
Which means: There absolutely *is* uncertainty (as all readers know, Syr’Nj has a very incomplete picture of what happened), and even given what she witnessed, Syr’Nj is choosing the worst interpretation she can. Which is understandable given her emotional condition, but is not objectively “correct” by any means.
Gravedust knew what the cosmos wanted, because it was what the mystics had always held to be true.
Until they didn’t.
And Gravy never really understood why.
When the mind has a strong pattern, even a complete contradicting experience won’t be enough to shatter it.
But it may be enough to plant a seed of doubt.
And maybe Gravedust realizes that no, he can’t actually speak for the cosmos, and that there could be a deeper truth to be explored.
Excellent dramatic lighting in this scene, btw.
But tell us how you really feel about Bandit Syr.
“She stole my hat!” – Syr’nj, probably.
Some sins are never forgiven.
“Mortified” as in “I am become DEATH”
and “Screeching in agony” as in “mostly the agony of other people, tbh”
“He’s too important to be killed off by a lowly support character!”