New Comics Every Weekday - Written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip
Flying hands? Really? Did the guy they paid to do the scroll get bored with normal arrows?
You think those are expository? Those are part of Caneghem’s Flying Hand Battalion. He and Bigby are tight like that.
It’s bigby’s pointing finger.
*Dons blotted glasses*
YE OLDE YEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!
Peter Griffin: Eh? Eh?
In order to do this, I must become Superman IV: The Quest for Peace!
I’m also pretty sure that they haven’t quite thought their cunning plan all the way through. If the other side has flying avians, then that lumbering air-whale is toast. All the avians have to do is fly above the blimp (out of missile range, of course), and then drop sharp and/or heavy and/or flaming objects onto it from a safe height. Enough punctures, rents, and burns, and that thing will drop out of the sky like a huge manatee.
Assuming they aren’t just sparrows or something and assuming that they don’t get their plan to use the main engine to ‘bird strike’ them working well enough.
Nothing is invincible.
They’ll work something out. Worst case scenario they’ll have to figure out how to keep the avians occupied elsewhere for a while. The addition of aerial forces is just too great a boon to pass up simply because the enemy already has a better one.
These things aren’t really meant for dogfighting so much as carpet bombing anyway. Losing against other aerial forces is to be expected from the very premise.
archers on top. catch them as they get close. mages to use force/wind spells to counter items dropped from above arrow range.
not hard to come up with counters to simple kinetic bombardment.
hell, here’s an easy way to make it hard to get knocked out of the sky that way: keep moving, and move from side to side. they can tag you, sure, but they can only have a realistic expectation to do so if they get close. that is, bow-range close.
see first paragraph regarding archers.
Well, as long as we’re actually thinking about this stuff for some reason I would say that archers would actually be a pretty shabby defense, especially if some types of avians are capable of reaching a higher altitude than the zeppelin. Shooting a fast target is hard enough without having to do so from below at steep angles. Generally speaking, the more primitive the technology, the bigger the difference altitude makes in air combat.
Luckily though, this stuff doesn’t matter, because losing because of li’l things altitude is way too boring to mean much in a magical zeppelins vs. crafty bird people, so I look forward to deferring to the writers on this one.
Oi now, there’s no way any kind of avian could reach a higher altitude than a zeppelin, although that there is indeed a crude design. Sure, the crew might get altitude sickness after a while, and would eventually die from asphyxiation and hypothermia, but zeppelins can go extremely high- far above the range of any (At)avian. As chairwoman of the guild of airshipmen, I will protest any further badmouthing of this most noble of crafts.
I’m pretty sure the fact that they have shields being built for their town means they can build shields for their airships. Then again…most engines of destruction have some critical flaw (death star, technodrome, etc)
Also, Gastonia is coming off as even more villainish than previous. Most of the times in stories the good guys ARE NOT the ones to have a major engine of destruction that will grind the bodies of their enemies into nothingness.
More precisely the good guys are generally not the only ones to have such an engine at their disposal in stories. If everyone has weaponry on that scale then so will the good guys, but if only one person is going to have it then that’s generally the bad guy just because that’s where the excitement is. You want the villain to be imposing and you want your protagonist to be an underdog.
Gastonia seems to be an imperfect nation, but we’ve yet to see anything villainish from them that I can recall. Keep in mind they’re hardly the only culture we’ve seen that indulges in some racisms and is hostile towards their neighbors. As near as I can tell it’s a period of political turbulence. Everyone’s hostile and everyone’s deathly, terribly afraid of the guys next door.
Thus far all the Gastonian leaders seem to be primarily concerned with doing their jobs, with a remarkable lack of corruption or self-interest. No one elected these guys hoping they would send the men of this nation in a suicide mission against a greater force while intentionally forgoing the tech that could have brought everyone’s husbands and fathers home alive.
In point of fact it’s the test subjects that to me are the first thing to hint at villainy. That’s directly ensuring that men don’t come home alive and the entire premise just reeks of “For the greater good” or some similar premise. Inconsensual human testing has never been the domain of the good guys in any story I can think of. Admittedly coupled with the warblimps it does form a very stark image, but the human testing is important here. The blimps on their own could have been excused.
1. I’m sure the World’s Rebellion does have some kind of weapon (or at least special magic/technology), probably from the goblins. Remember that huge gem-encrusted sculpture with a humanoid torso, including a large abdomen-embedded gem that looked a whole lot like the one Harki has embedded in his abdomen which boosts his healing? That may already be more than just art, and more of the trolls may have such magic (or something equally powerful).
2. As far as Gastonia and villainy, I think that waging war against the Savasi and driving them from their ancestral home into the desert so they can claim the mountains counts.
1. You kidding? You saw that guy leading the dwarfs, killing off all the mystics and leading them into a new age of whatever. There’s no way in hell they don’t have some monumental tricks up their sleeves already. He was all about the new shit and the innovation, and I have no doubts he’s been bringing it about with fearsome efficiency. Everyone involved might not know it yet, but this just became an arms race right in front of us.
2. I’d think that would be debatable in a lot of ways, but I’m feeling kind of sketchy on the details of that so I’m not gonna argue the point. They have however inarguably been a military nation thus far, and a successful one at that. I wasn’t ignoring that part of the picture.
First thing I thought of was Gaston, from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast. Handsome human who’s ego, smugness, sense of entitlement and hatred of things that were different from himself made him repulsive.
That would be spectacularly apt.
He’s talking about using weapons of war (experimental) against invading enemy soldiers. Enemy soldiers tricked into thinking they broke through by skill, but still attacking enemy soldiers.
A dirty trick, but compared with the sort of stuff the ‘good guys’ get up to in the real world Gastonia are hardly the stuff of nightmare.
Oh, oops. I had it in reverse. I thought he was doing this to his own men.
emmm… they arent sacrificing their own troops with these tests. that would be stupid AND unethical. why test your potentially-horrifingly-deadly death machine on your own guys when your enemy is right there and you already need to kill THEM.
Late night posts are the best posts ;)
Well, if there’s that much effort put into layering shields over a town, they probably need, like. Anchors or something. Shield totems, things like that. It probably isn’t easy or cheap to do.
The shields remind me of the dwarf repellent force field from Billy & Mandy except it’s for trolls and such instead of just dwarves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmpeOpwLDOg (07:44)
Skysteel shield on the top of the balloon. If it’s a large enough balloon to lift a massive airship chasis under it, I’m sure it can lift a steel cover over it.
…I GET IT!
Interesting outlines on that map there.
As long as the attacking hordes don’t go through Belgium…
It seems familiar, somehow. Maybe one of those theme maps from Civilization?
Theat’s basically a map of Europe.
It looks like Gastonia is France+Germany, and the capital is aproximately where Strasbourg is in the real world.
Actually, Gastonia seems to be France+Germany+Switzerland+a big chunk of Northern Italy, with the capital at Strasbourg.
Um… Charlemagne’s kingdom?
It was called Franken, or Franconia, and technically it was an empire.
There is indeed some striking resemblance to middle europe, exept a giant chunk of France is, well, water.
The most interesting feature on that map is the river that extends from one sea to the other, with a delta a both ends.
One wonders how that might be accomplished, as the deltas indicate the downstream direction. This would only work if there was some great underground geyser of water directly on the continental divide, acting as source for both the north-flowing half and the south-flowing half.
Either that or a wizard did it.
And if I’m not mistaken, the source for those rivers is Gastonia itself. This makes a little more sense, as it would mean that the city was built there on purpose, to take advantage of this freak of geography.
It’s not that uncommon. You get a natural spring (or something similar) that has no way to easily evacuate water so it forms a lake. Then, something about the surrounding terrain means that, once the lake is large enough, two evacuation points emerge, one on either side. Rivers flow down from the lake, and head off in completely different directions. When they reach lowlands, each forms a delta.
Is the map in panel two showing three detachments of X-Men?
“Here we see our detachment of Dreadful Flying Gloves. Pepperland shall be o-blue-terated!”
“… and a big thank-you to whomever brought these excellent brownies!”
Now witness the power of this fully armed and operational….ahh, screw it. This is like Star Wars, Flash Gordon and D&D mashed together. I can already see the poor avians doing a Hawkmen style attack on that Death Blimp Star: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnTHypbLlkE&feature=related
But, of course, first they have to get to Endor and disable the Lightning Shield.
you had a flash of insight, there.
You make a good point. As long as the avians don’t have access to a Queen soundtrack, the Gastonians should be okay.
Am I a bad person, if I rooted for the Warship?
Anyway… such an attack is a desperate one. They simply massed the ship down. No tactics, no nothing, just measuring the cost in lives, and deciding, that they would win. Avians are few, their flying ability makes them significant, so such an attack against blimps full of archers and such wouldn’t be wise.
I started to root for the savage races… hell, ever the bad guys…
Their avians are so small they’re avoiding our turbolasers?
Huh? This shit be straight Final Fantasy, yo.
But I get those comparisons, too. Besides, any excuse to do a BRIAN BLESSED impersonation is a good enough for me. Sadly, the only quote that I wanted to do was ninja’d from me by Bruceski. :(
Drafting adventurers, there’s no possible way that could go wrong. It also wouldn’t be a waste of money at all, nope. Clearly our Space Marshal here is a master stragedist.
I wouldn’t underestimate the adventurers if I were you. There’s proven history there.
Oh wait, yes, the plot demands it. I wonder how implausible the way of making adventurers relevant will be.
Honestly the way I see it it’s just augmenting your forces with some mercenaries. They’ve got more field experience, they’re better equipped and best of all you can afford to lose them. It can even be encourage since there’s potential to save money if these guys don’t make it out of the other end of the battle alive.
I don’t know about real life, but it’s hardly unheard of for fictional wars. Having an elite force of disposable troops to throw in all the most dangerous missions is generally just plain beneficial, not to mention that these guys are often possessed of skills not covered in standard military training.
Ultimately though what it comes down to is a way to get more soldiers on the field and the rest is just gravy. It’s a draft, and I’m quite sure that even in real life you generally draft the part of the populace that’s combat ready first before you start grabbing farmers and people that need to be trained from scratch. It’s helpful when they already know how to hold a gun, and if they’ve already seen combat so much the better.
not to mention they bring their own gear and buy their own health potions.
they also probably have lots of combat experience which, even though not from something as large as a battle, is better than no/little combat experience.
Yeah, NOBODY uses mercenaries. Ever.
You know, simmilar blimbs loaded with troops or supplies, flying behind your own front line, could work great to mobilize quickly in tough terrain, such as mountains and swamps. Such an advantage, even at limited numbers could prove a great boon in defense. Stack on the use of a Mercenary Adventurers’ Guild that you deploy via timely use of flying ships… You could easily turn back a larger force. And it is an advantage they’ll need against the Troll led forces.
After all, their enemy has built in advantages. Several of the enemy races can move better in diffrent terrains, and have natural weaponry that gives them a supply advantage. Natural weapons means less reliance on manufactured weapon shipments. And it is possible that some of their troops have a greater dietary advantage if they can eat things commmon in the field. Such as rock, rotted meat, or humans.
emmm…. no. sorry blimps arent nearly that awesome. in fact using them anywhere near a mountain would be suicidal. Imagine a balloon, it gets blown around right? this is a really big balloon that is susceptible to any and all currents (to some degree) and they are REALLY slow. like, a guy with a couple extra horses could easily outrun a blimp and stay ahead.
bombing? great! troop transport? no.
Did anyone else hear the A-Team theme at the end there?
Aw. Yesterday’s hope that the person seated where General Grumpyface has turned out to be was Dedalus has gone poof.
Caneghem would make a fortune if he invented for general use a magical powerpoint. Erm, magicpoint?
Great… Now they’re going to spam Trade asking people to sign their charter.
Made me laugh harder than needed.
And here I just thought you guys spelled Gilded wrong. Silly me.
Miss you so bad, KoZ.
I’m surprised you all survived the crippling depression of not having me around.
>Implying I don’t see you on /co/ like all damn day.
I seriously hope you guys don’t still do this.
You’re on /co/ a lot?
…I’ve probably called you names.
If they’re creative enough, I doubt he minded. I know that *I* respect some imaginative cursing when I see it.
Not that I’ve seen. I mostly lurk and F5 all day to read Storytimes.
Harder to do now with all the Generals. All the generals all the time.
That’s actually not me. It’s a different King of Zeroes. One of these days I’ll actually care enough that he besmirches my good name and challenge him to a duel to the death. So feel free to continue giving that scoundrel his comeuppance.
Phil, I just want you to know that just because I haven’t been posting much lately does NOT mean that I don’t appreciate the return of the good Colonel Pornstache. I’ve just been speechless in His presence. Thank you.
I am starting to think this whole webcomic is just an elaborate teaser for an upcoming MMO :P Not that I’d mind that, you know.
“In the Kingdom of Arkerra, great armies are marshalled…
– For the World’s Rebellion! Raargh!
– For Gastonia! Huzzah!
… Great battles are joined …
— [Clang!] [Zip!] [Whoosh!]
— Where ya het, boy?
… but the outcome depends upon brave adventurers …
— [A montage of the protagonists]
… and YOU are their spear carriers!
— [A montage of young people at computers, chattering on headsets]
You are the the givers of quests!
— There are giant rats in the basement! I’ll give you 100 GP to defeat all five!
— Our child is lost in the woods! We’ll give you a slightly better sword if you save her!
For the Fate of the Kingdoms of Arkerra depends…
— Daedalus laughs insanely
…upon SOMEONE ELSE!
Yikes– i think i see the end game here. The sky elves, the elfiest of the elfiest elves in the world, have been invited to blanket Gastonia with supreme magic. So once the rebellion is crushed, that magic can be turned from defence to offense and solve the monkey, er human, problem once and for all.
At which point all Arkerra players are given there final scores and the game is reset to the beginning.
A giant golem-god comes into it somehow, I’m sure.
There’s a white guy in the second panel that looks like he’s trying to use the force to keep the scroll in place. His hand is irrelevant.
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