Guilded Age

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Annotations Every Day - Written by T Campbell & Flo Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip

WE'LL HAVE CARRIAGES THAT DRIVE THEMSELVES! TAVERNS THAT PREPARE YOUR MEAL IN MERE MINUTES! DEVICES THAT FINELY DICE VEGETABLES IN ONE SWIFT MOTION! FANTASTICAL MIRACLE LINENS THAT SOP UP SPILLS INSTANTLY!

Chapter 2, Page 16

on December 9, 2009
Chapter: Chapter 02
└ Tags: Byron, Sundar
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Discussion (32) ¬

  1. Michael Ezra
    Michael Ezra
    December 9, 2009, 12:06 am | # | Reply

    Yeah yeah, but where’s my jetpack, and why am I living on Earth instead of in a space colony, like I was promised?

    • Saiyanwolf
      Saiyanwolf
      October 12, 2014, 1:09 am | # | Reply

      It 2014 and there still no jetpack

      • SotiCoto
        SotiCoto
        January 9, 2015, 6:05 am | # | Reply

        2015. Still still no jetpack.

        • AlexPickles
          AlexPickles
          June 25, 2015, 5:37 pm | # | Reply

          There’s one coming out next year though for consumers if you want to pay $150,000.

  2. DCB
    DCB
    December 9, 2009, 12:10 am | # | Reply

    See, that there. That’s taking one for the team.

  3. Random dude
    Random dude
    December 9, 2009, 12:14 am | # | Reply

    Well… Your updates are on time, it’s an extremly humerous take on generic fantasy, and the humor employes is… Is… Well, I don’t know the official word for the type but it’s that kind of humor that’s… Funny. Yeah.

  4. Carapace
    Carapace
    December 9, 2009, 1:28 am | # | Reply

    I note a distinct lack of mechanical whores.
    But I glory daily in the magic self-drawing water buckets.

    • Dragon_DLV
      Dragon_DLV
      December 9, 2009, 2:12 am | # | Reply

      Carapace…. They’re out there… just not to common…. apparently.

      http://www.realdoll.com/

      • Erica
        Erica
        December 9, 2009, 9:09 am | # | Reply

        You get a star.

      • Hypothetical
        Hypothetical
        December 9, 2009, 12:36 pm | # | Reply

        I don’t even want to think about the type of person who would own one of those…especially the “she-male” version.

        • Erica
          Erica
          December 9, 2009, 12:40 pm | # | Reply

          There’s a documentary called “Guys and Dolls” about the phenomenon. They talk to several men who have given up on real women and just have dolls for various reasons. You can find it in five parts on YouTube.

        • Phil
          Flo
          December 9, 2009, 12:50 pm | # | Reply

          Not sure if want.

        • Kilroy Quartermaine
          Kilroy Quartermaine
          May 24, 2010, 5:54 pm | # | Reply

          Honestlly, I want one. Can you imagine the advantage to an artist’s model that doesn’t need to get up and stretch? That can hold the same pose for weeks at a time? Yay!

      • Justin
        Justin
        December 9, 2009, 5:04 pm | # | Reply

        I dunno if I would call a Real-Doll a ‘mechanical whore’, it’s flexible, but it doesn’t move. *sleazy mode on* If I’m going to go to a whore, I want one who’s going to give me that ‘come hither look’. Going to be a while before that’ll be possible. Still, I reckon some lab in Japan will have one out before too long. . .

        • Erica
          Erica
          December 10, 2009, 6:20 pm | # | Reply

          You can have them customized to have that come hither look.

          • SotiCoto
            SotiCoto
            June 20, 2013, 10:32 am | # | Reply

            I wonder if they can be customised to look dead, then left in the closet or under the floorboards?

            • Vivian Faberfox
              Vivian Faberfox
              January 2, 2015, 10:14 pm | # | Reply

              Enemy?

              • SotiCoto
                SotiCoto
                January 9, 2015, 6:10 am | # | Reply

                … Test Subject? “Victim”?

  5. Magnor
    Magnor
    December 9, 2009, 2:39 am | # | Reply

    The best part about the flavor text is that as soon as he started ranting, Sundar’s voice changed to the ShamWow guy’s for no explicable reason – THEN I read the flavor text. Get out of my head!

    (disregard that you can stay if you want)

    • Phil
      Flo
      December 9, 2009, 6:36 am | # | Reply

      It is Guilded Age official policy that we have at least one Shamwow joke per chapter.

      Tune in next month when our heroes storm the gates of Shamwowia!

    • Vivian Faberfox
      Vivian Faberfox
      January 2, 2015, 10:18 pm | # | Reply

      But, They ~already~ have shamans, and I’m purretty sure a user dubbed shamwow the plural form of shaman back on, like, the second page of GD’s introduction story . . . So don’t they already have shamwows?

      (Of course, I like my idea of Shamany better. : p)

  6. Fren
    Fren
    December 9, 2009, 7:55 am | # | Reply

    I submit that Bandit Keynes be given a special attack involving a Shamwow. If you’re stuck for ideas, she could backstab someone and then jam the wound with a Shamwow. This could cause all of a person’s blood to be soaked into the space age, made in Germany microfiber.

    • Phil
      Flo
      December 9, 2009, 8:08 am | # | Reply

      Either way, I think we finally now can fully comprehend how bags of holding work.

  7. Fren
    Fren
    December 10, 2009, 8:03 am | # | Reply

    So then, what would happen if you put a Portable Hole inside of a Bag of Holding and then wrapped it with a ShamWow?

  8. T
    T
    December 10, 2009, 9:55 am | # | Reply

    Oblivion.

  9. Sydness
    Sydness
    December 29, 2009, 2:48 pm | # | Reply

    Dang. Now I need to start yelling “Mechanical Whores” whenever I’m in a bar. Curse your intense quotability!

  10. Terrador
    Terrador
    December 30, 2009, 10:22 am | # | Reply

    Loving the comic. I have a suggestion on site layout. The navigation panel could be replicated at the top or bottom of the page. Scrolling all the way up or down to get to just the right comic to show to a friend would be nice.

    • T
      T
      December 30, 2009, 11:27 am | # | Reply

      I think you mean “not having to scroll…” Right?

      We’re going to upgrade the site layout fairly soon, and I think this is a good suggestion. So keep watching.

  11. Sayabubbles
    Sayabubbles
    January 15, 2010, 2:30 pm | # | Reply

    I believe those mechanical whores would be like Chester 5000. At least lookwise.
    http://jessfink.com/Chester5000XYV/?p=34
    Now, THAT is a good robot.

  12. Alex
    Alex
    March 24, 2014, 12:36 pm | # | Reply

    Still no hoverboard…

  13. Josh
    Josh
    April 8, 2015, 12:35 pm | # | Reply

    that guy is crazy! none of that will ever happen… oh wait…

  14. .....
    .....
    April 10, 2015, 11:20 pm | # | Reply

    if it steps to the side gut it

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Guilded Age is co-written by T Campbell & Flo Kahn, and illustrated by John Waltrip. Site design by Samantha Kyle. Fonts by Blambot.com.
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