A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for ten drinks. Within seconds, he’s finished the last one and graciously thanks the bartender. Surprised, the bartender tells him: “You drank those down faster than anyone I’ve seen before.” The man smiles and says “You would too if you have what I have.”
“What’s that?” The bartender asks.
“No money,” the man says, then runs out of the bar.
A string walks into a bar and says “BC8F12D2791A1A90” The bartender is totally confused, until a second string walks in and says “Forgive my friend. He isn’t NULL terminated.”
Oh God it’s like a trainwreck, and ever car is packed with sad clowns. I want to look away but the chorus of squeeking noses and tear filled shoes is too great.
In my head, I hear Mel Brooks as Comicus in History of the World Part One.
Gravedust: Have you heard of the gnomes new religion? They are a laugh riot! First of all, they are so poor…
Swiftus: How poor are they?
Comicus: Thank you! They are so poor… that they only have *one* God!
Comicus: But you humans are rich. You’ve got a lot of gods.You’ve got a god for everything. The only thing you don’t have a god for is premature ejaculation… but I hear that’s coming quickly.
@dojang: Gravedust seems to get more pale based on how much faith in the world he has here :P WHen he introduces himself he’s all bright and cheerful…then they laugh and he gets paler. Then he tries to tell his joke and lightens up a bit…then he might as well have lost a quart of blood as you pointed out heh
Discussion (64) ¬
Aww…poor Gravedust.
Also, “Plotzo?” Is this club the fantasy genre equivalent of the Borscht Belt?
It lacks timing, but it makes up for it in racism.
I give it 3 out of 4 Simon.
The audience’s reaction makes me want to give Gravedust a big hug :<
are lot of them are thinking “this guy, what’s the point?”
I want to turn that last panel into a meme.
Gravedust appears to have grasped the essence of minstrelry.
Comedy gold!
Two men walk into a bar. You’d think one of them would’ve noticed.
Did I say men? I meant dwarves.
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for ten drinks. Within seconds, he’s finished the last one and graciously thanks the bartender. Surprised, the bartender tells him: “You drank those down faster than anyone I’ve seen before.” The man smiles and says “You would too if you have what I have.”
“What’s that?” The bartender asks.
“No money,” the man says, then runs out of the bar.
Did I say man? I meant gnome.
Ha AHha HA ha ha HAHAHAHA
Two men walk into a bar, the third ducks.
A skeleton walks into a bar and says, “Gimme a beer.”
“And a mop.”
A string walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, “No, we don’t serve your kind here.”
The string goes out in the street, tears his hair and stomps his feet, ties himself in a knot, just gets really worked up.
Then, taking a deep breath, he calms and enters the bar a second time. And a second time, he asks for a drink.
The bartender glares at him and says, “Aren’t you the same string that was just in here?”
“No, I’m a frayed knot.”
It’s just not as funny written. ):
A string walks into a bar and says “BC8F12D2791A1A90” The bartender is totally confused, until a second string walks in and says “Forgive my friend. He isn’t NULL terminated.”
That’s awfully tame looking garbage…
A man walks into a bar.
Did I say man? I meant dwarf.
Did I say bar? I meant dwarf.
The faces really do make the man.
Bandit brought it up and now I can’t unsee it.
Third panel stare spells DOOM
HA! Dwarf!
Ohh man thats gold, pure gold.
And now we’re back to racial profiling again…
Oh those wacky dwarves and their alcohol. What would they ever do without it?
Mushrooms.
aw man, he’s telling jokes.
I thought he’d deliver a lecture about equal rights. that’d get them laughing.
hammer? but i hardly know her!
props to erica on that last panel. even without sadfaec- really nailed the right colours to subtly throw that one from a joke to a darker mood.
Three dwarfs walk out of a tavern.
Hey, it could happen.
I wonder if this is how Carlos Mencia got started.
I…uh…erm…
That’s not very funny. Or possibly I am reading this when much too tired.
You lack taste, my friend.
I was very tired. Also, it wasn’t Gravedust’s joke that wasn’t funny.
It was the last three panels part. I get it, now. But at the time, I was all “wtf? was someone slow to hit the laugh track?”
Ha! Oh, those crazy dwarves!
*Laughtrack, freeze frame.*
Oh God it’s like a trainwreck, and ever car is packed with sad clowns. I want to look away but the chorus of squeeking noses and tear filled shoes is too great.
Ooo…Ardaic is not going to be happy, because Gravey is absolutely SLAYING that audience!
Why did the dwarf cross the road? To get to the booze on the other side!
I love how Gravy’s alternating between “hey, I’m entertaining” and “omg, look at these fucking people”.
In my head, I hear Mel Brooks as Comicus in History of the World Part One.
Gravedust: Have you heard of the gnomes new religion? They are a laugh riot! First of all, they are so poor…
Swiftus: How poor are they?
Comicus: Thank you! They are so poor… that they only have *one* God!
Comicus: But you humans are rich. You’ve got a lot of gods.You’ve got a god for everything. The only thing you don’t have a god for is premature ejaculation… but I hear that’s coming quickly.
In Savasi lands, joke tells you!
@dojang: Gravedust seems to get more pale based on how much faith in the world he has here :P WHen he introduces himself he’s all bright and cheerful…then they laugh and he gets paler. Then he tries to tell his joke and lightens up a bit…then he might as well have lost a quart of blood as you pointed out heh
Gravedust is still funnier than Dane Cook.
I just noticed something. It didn’t register at first ’cause I was unaware it was possible, but Gravedust is actually smiling in that second panel.
Yes, isn’t he cure?
*cute
Goddammit, an edit button, an edit button, my starship for an edit button!
I love it when people use shakespeare as a basis for new jokes. and I’m not being sarcastic.
and you get mad props for a)having such an awesome name and pic and b)staying in character
meow.
Always a pleasure sir.
I guess the humour came up short.
“I got a million of ’em!”
Two men walk into a bar. The dwarf behind them doesn’t because he’s too short.
The old ones are the best
A woman walks into a bar. She apologizes and quickly checks the boards for damage. Did i say woman? I meant wood elf.
a woman walks into a bar. She throws a grappling hook and scales it, pausing only to steal tow pocket watches. Did i say woman? I meant gnome.
a woman walks into a bar. She whips out her 2 handed mace and demolishes it in fury. Did i say woman? Yes, i believe i did.
Oh, a human joke. Somewhere, a Dwarf is rotflmao!