New Comics Every Weekday - Written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip
dman what was in those?
She blinded him with … oh nevermind!
And maybe some Poison Arrow Frog secretions.
“It was beauty killed the beast.”
Well, unless you’re talking about the one with Jack Black, where he really hams it up. In that case, the line is, ” ‘Twas beauty killed beast.”
And trust me, that ” ’twas” makes a good difference.
That’s some fast-acting sedative there, Syr’nj.
I think the gaping hole in his torso is finally catching up with him, too.
Like I said on an earlier strip, that has to be enough tranqs to drop a small elephant.
Or poison. She might have figured his rage-heightened metabolism would shrug off even a quadruple dose of tranqs.
He’s probably dead.
BAM! Fast actin’ Tinactin!
And that’s the power of Pine Sol baby.
Well, that combat could have done better. Who’s got the char-gen rules?
what happened to frigg?
Her armor was dented in, compressing her ribcage and making it hard for her to breathe. Hard to kick ass without air in your lungs.
no, i mean in the pevious page she was about to get sliced and diced. Did Syr draw the attention on herself before Byron landed the blow or what?
i think the authors want to keep us in suspense in regards to Frigg’s fate, just like we haven’t seen Bandit’s fate yet either
just remember kids! two axes through the collarbones will only minorly hinder you if you have the right potions!
Well, Bandit about had half of her torso severed from her spine… so she’s in no condition to even use those potions herself.
Not sure. Feels like there’s a panel missing to be honest.
My assumption is that Syr’nj distracted him by calling out.
IRL sedatives are very hard to administer correctly, and unless you’re very careful tend to either have very little effect or outright kill the person. (This is why anesthesiologists need to go to medical school and make a lot of money) However, this is fictionland, and Syrn’j is awesome, so that’s probably not a problem.
Also, does Byron purposely wear red to make it less obvious when he’s injured? Because I forgot he was until the last panel there.
I say that was 3 doses elephant sedative, 1 dose general-purpose intravenous healing potion. After all, as potentially deadly conditions go, what are 4 needle pricks and some badly applied anesthetics when you have a gaping spear hole on your chest?
tranquiliser guns ezist though.
for use on animals.
they’re loaded light too. many times it takes multiple darts to do the job, especially on high-mass animals.
and they STILL kill the occasional animal.
If you’ve ever watched vet shows, ever notice how they prop the critter’s mouth open when they’ve got them sedated? That’s the danger with tranks; high mass animals (and berserkers!) need a lot of trank to drop them, but that much sedative can stop their heart or make them stop breathing.
In Byron’s case……….
Eh, percentiles. 50/50 chance of survival.
i’m sure he also forgot it was there…
Talk about using excessive four-ce.
Bar, I sure do appreciate your attempts to inject some humor into this bleak situation.
I think you guys are missing the point.
Quit needling them
That pun needs a shot in the arm.
I dont know. I thought it was pretty sharp.
i dunno, i thought it was kind of tired.
You might think I’m a prick, but I actually like all these needle-es puns.
I know, right? I hate it when people get too Syr-ious.
In any case it was nice to see Byron dart forth like that.
I-ma get stabby on you guys
Then we might need Syr’Nj to administer an IV to you as well.
And when you’re down we can through salt into the IV wound.
Amusingly, this string of replies now resembles an ampule.
So I guess we made our point.
The pen-icillin is mightier than the sword? maybe…
I thought I’d inject some life into this discussion.
This thread is about to fall flat on its face.
With everyone combat-capable out of commission… what happens now?
Well, either Byron comes back to life after a brief nappy-time and lays into the trolls, or things will have to get mighty silly for the party to have a reasonable chance at escape. I WOULD like to see pornstache come in on a Gastonian airship and bombard the trolls with cannon though.
They do have ‘just cause’ for such an action, as the feelthy wargs did violate the sanctity of a parley.
Colonel Pornstache to the rescue would be epic win. On an airship with mounted moose artillery.
I don’t think “fight more (and win)” and “(everyone) escape(s)” are the only options as such. Did Bandit unlock the doors and simply require help pushing them open? Will Frigg and Syr’nj have to make an agonizing decision to leave possibly injured/possibly dead friends behind in order to escape with their own lives? What’s going on in the stands–is everyone fleeing from “berserker rabies”…or awestruck? “But my Chieftain, we don’t…”what?
I’m only ticked because soon I expect a chapter title page instead of a strip. :-D
Maybe Syrinj is hailed as a mighty warrior for slaying “the demon”, and the savage races switch their allegiance to her rather than Harki the Weak and Yellow.
Oh damn, that alt text is awful sullen. That can’t be good.
I’m HOPING that’s just what Syr is saying (or thinking) to Byron as she drugs him up…
Syr should just sell that stuff as the world’s best anesthesia and get it over with
Well… with Harki obviously getting owned by that guy, it has shown that he’s not as an invincible leader as his followers thought he was. Remember when that minion questioned him? And he looked to be the timidest of the bunch…
We could hope for a full on civil war. I am… Mostly, if not all, hoping for making a run with a living Gravedust and bandit.
why does this remind me of the cultist foreseeing him leading armies?
ok, i’m so out of any ideas that i cannot even speculate.
well i’m ready for the horde to start taking orders form Syr’nj ;)
my mind… is..blown.
She is the last one standing. I mean so the one v. one (or in this case four and a half vs. one) for control of the horde of savage races cliche has been done… still, a stereotype is usually grounded in truth… amiright?
Also MAGICAL SELF-READJUSTING GOGGLES. WE’RE JUDGING YOU, GUYS. WE’RE JUDGING SO HARD.
She used SCIENCE to readjust them.
Science be praised!
RJ got his (her?) wish from last comment yesterday.
Also: She looks entirely too shocked that he fell into her arms… I’m highly suspicious that the needles actually did it and think he may have either fallen out of rage and passed out, or come to his senses and collapsed on her to cry.
I think the needles did it and her face is more of an “OH GOD I WASN’T SURE IF THAT WOULD WORK OR NOT.”
I think Byron’s position says “unconscious or dead” more than “I really need a hug.” ;-) I would have loved to see his face, though–did he just black out mid-kill-mode? Was there a moment of “What the–?!” or “Oh, f—!” or simply “Owwww!!!!”?
RAHGHGHLGHARGHLGHG – uhhhh – phwoomph
Please note that the needles aren’t hollow. The contents behind them (if any) aren’t playing a roll here.
i dunno if any of us has entirely forgotten but that guy is DIYING over there, with a spear pierced through his heart or something. he’s gonna end up with a pierced whenever he recognises the havoc he has caused anyway.
heart*….end up with a pierced heart*. goddarn keyboard is testing my patience!
Byron, you were the chosen one, you were my brother…well, more like that cousin you have funny feelings about, but the point stands!
Something for the occasion: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n998mTia61s
Also what’s with the alt text, is Syr going to take advantage of Byron now?
thats what you say to a dear friend when you are forced to kill em. I.E. Old yeller, highlander,whatever
… That’s country. Though, I’ll forgive it, Captain, because of the pun. However, you do realize that this means war.
Hey, it’s not country. :/ It’s pop-rock or some such crap. In any case nice return but: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UsONBKFbL-w
Oh my science I had no idea she’s a Christian themed musician, I’m so sorry. Hopefully that other one makes up for it.
Science Never Forgives. (Breakout album of “Syr’ and the Tranqs”)
Had to get in on this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_wssByW7JQ
Well played, new comer. But, can you beat MUSIC I DON’T EVEN LISTEN TO?!
I was looking for another song, but I have class in a few minutes and couldn’t find it fast enough. Stupid college. :P
Seriously, no one went here?
I thought about it, but it seemed way too obvious. I already consider that to be Syr’s theme song. :-)
Now, if one of those had hit him in the eye…
Syr considers this to be a love making song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CN9XzGffw-0
I would have guessed Syr’nj was a Loreena McKennit fan.
I actually kinda like this one, too. And it seems to fit both Syr and Byron.
But, seriously, we’re going to run out of songs with punny names eventually.
I know this band was used already, but I thought this was a more apt song choice!
If we’re going to get into the field of medicine, then…
damn keep them coming!
I don’t care if this makes me seem old:
The first few lines are spot on.
Well done crew, I’m proud of you.
Wasn’t Hawkwing the band Lemmy Killmister was in before Motorhead? Yup, old. *runs away*
Maybe not quite on target, as PWK is magical rather that alchemical, but worth mentioning for the D&D theme…
“Good heavens Miss Sakamoto – you’re beautiful!”
“What happened to Frigg?” becomes another offstage question in the same way as “what happened to Bandit?”.
Getting increasingly suspicious of this being a dream sequence, because there’s not really any other way out of this situation now that isn’t a stonking great deus ex machina.
oh no way… while i can’t see any way out that isn’t deus ex machina either, a dream sequence would be a huge cop out.
Hey, we still have the one “preview” image of Someone Lurking In the Shadows…
That Someone will emerge from the Shadows… soon.
What we don’t know yet:
Phil and T. are actually ending the comic. Bandit and Gravedust are both dead, Byron was just killed by a lethal dose of sedatives or poison, and an incapacitated Frigg and somewhat defenseless Syr are going to be riddled with arrows by Harki’s archers. The last page will be of Best on a tropical beach, surrounded by beautiful women, being an enormous kharma-defying douche. After that page goes up, the two writers will split a bottle of scotch, kick back, and watch as the heads of their fanbase explode like fireworks on the Fourth of July.
Sometimes you just end with a TPK.
Will we roll up new characters next week, or just play Catan instead?
Damn you, you nearly made my head explode just by stating that!
I’d actually like that. :D
I almost posted this three comics back and mentioned how epic that would be. But then it occurred to me that all the unsolved back story would just be a red herring and that’s just plain mean story-telling. Meanies…
And did I say the last page would be Best relaxing with beautiful ladies and being a douche? No, my bad, that’d be the second to last page. The real last page would be Best flipping us all off with both hands.
If the comic were written by Mark Millar, that would probably be exactly how it would end.
“He’s the goddamn shit elf!”
…We’d never forget this webcomic, that’s for sure.
Achievement Unlocked: BEST ending ever.
WHY DID I HAVE TO SAY THIS
Subj: System Status
Hey boss, sorry to interrupt your coma, but interference from the adrenals has cleared and there are 1537 messages from remote nerve nodes now arriving. All describe serious damage. In addition, there has been no contact with the heart or lungs for over 3 minutes. Lactic acid saturation has reached a destrutive level. Blood pressure, electrolytic movement, and neuro-electrical activity are below critical and dropping. Recommend activating “Life Passing Before My Eyes” program.
One internet to you sir!
This is why I always read the comments.
And here I was just going to say: “and then Byron bleeds to death.” This is so much more well done.
I love this.
well played Sir.
This is so well done that I can’t even find words.
Cue cut to a tavern;
“And that’s the story of just one of our many wipes!”
I had a few “anger issues” back in my day. Hilariously, this is almost exactly how real doctors handle them.
When in doubt, induce a comatose state using dangerous chemicals!
fly my precious nerf darts! fly!
I can’t wait for some kind of conclusion! This whole ark has had me so emotionally stressed! Gosh this is good!
Well, it seems to me that as far as Frigg is concerned, Byron was distracted (a common failing of berserkers… OH, bloody) and just leapt over Frigg to confront a new “threat”.
Frigg is tough, and as soon as she gets the latches on her back and breast unhooked, she’ll be able to breathe. There is definitely an armorer in her future, however, should she survive.
Fictional sedatives always act almost instantaneously, but I am not quite sure what to make of Syr’ng’s expression in the last panel. Something else besides Byron’s collapse has startled her, is my theory.
i’m guessing at least one character is going to die or at least be out of commission / out of the comic for a while. with this much damage, i’d be really surprised if everyone made it out relatively ok.
And thus it came to pass that Syr’nj was named Queen of the Savage Races, healed all of their boo-boos, and sent Harki to “time out.”
So is anyone but me wondering whether, starting next chapter, we will see flashbacks instead of flarshforwards?
That’s how the first season of “Sledgehammer” ended, with everybody dying from a nuke. Season 2 was a prequel of sorts, happening before the first.
I love Sledge Hammer! I remember that the cast/producers said they had to open season 2 with “Five Years Earlier…” because they assumed they were getting cancelled, hence Sledge setting off the bomb at the end of season 1. Uh-oh…we’re hinting at our ages, aren’t we? :-D Anyway, mainly I was thinking that since we’ve caught up with the flash-forwards, and since we obviously now have Big Unresolved Backstories (Sry’nj is royalty, what’s the deal with Byron and berserking, also potentially stuff with the Dwarven mystics), it seems logical that future chapters might open with flashbacks as the characters sort themselves out in the present.
This reminds me somehow on this szene from Van Hellsing…
Doesn’t that beg the question:
“Why not do that before he called her friends?”
I really don’t think it’s necessary to emphasize the “action lines” so much. The streaks of white in panels 4 and 5 feel really overdone, especially in #4 where they obscure so much of the “primary content”.
you mean boobies, right?
More seriously, as a fellow artist, I love special effects like the action lines on those syringes. You can obscure a multitude of sins by putting special effects over them :p
Okay, now that the friendly fire is off, lets see what we got left…
Bandit and Gravedust, presumed dead/dying, so we can’t count on their help.
Frigg was knocked down, but we don’t know how exactly bad the damage, so she may be able to help.
Byron is half-dead and sedated, nuff’ said.
Syringe (for I forget how exactly to spell her name) is the only one still up and fight. Science can still be done.
And… the bad guys still have and army with them, and still have the upper hand.
…. Re-roll anyone?
All I’m hoping now is that the human race secretly have an army that would barge in and take care of everything, and that the group was only a distraction/precaution.
That’s “human race-ists”.
The Human Race is a non-stop race, with too many trials and no real case.
I dont know. I think Sry’nj can get them out of this one, assuming she can bluff. After all, if she can sedate berzerker-byron, she can certainly UN-sedate him. Sort of an I-have-a-berzerker-and-I-know-how-to-use-him manuvre
I can’t help but feel like there’s going to have to be a long, serious chat about Byron’s contribution to the group after this (that is assuming the whole party somehow makes it out of this of course. Frigg’s shattered ribs, Bandit’s severed BODY, Gravedust’s melted brain, Byron’s gaping chest wound and all). We all know he’s a gifted tactician and leader but his non-berserker combat has been lackluster, even after he had an epiphany that he should start sucking less he didn’t improve. His berserker state turns him into an unstoppable engine of blades and severed fingers but now he’s causing more of a problem for the group than he would have just staying dead as Frigg instructed.
I have to comment on this mainly because I’m actually in the process of playing a frenzied berserker in a campaign ran by one of my friends. One has to realize that when a person is like that they often hold back on normal combat for fear of the frenzy coming out in them and thus their out of rage combat is often “lackluster”. They do provide a massive bonus to the party though in combat when they fly into the rage as it turns out more often then not there is nothing that can stop them until they tire themselves out. Granted sometimes things like this happen where the party ends up getting beaten too but more often then not there are enough enemies to occupy the berserker until they fall over from exhaustion. So he’s not really doing a bad job so far he’s just had really bad luck as far as situations go. He would excel if say Harki’s entire bodyguard or a large task force had been down there with them.
Anyone else remember that Syr’nj has been trained as a medic to save people from injuries like the ones the party just sustained?
I’m thinking she’ll heal them up as fast as she can, excepting Frigg who doesn’t need much healing and will be able to walk once she unclasps her plate. Frigg’s healing is a lot less urgently needed, so she might just get a quick wrapping.
I’m much more concerned about Frigg’s mental state. She’s never really LOST before. In case you hadn’t noticed, she hasn’t exactly reacted well to being unable to do everything on her own in the past. Like when bending the bars, or that time she got kidnapped. I’m thinking they’re all going to make it out of this alive, but that we’re about to see Frigg deal with some sort of mental breakdown, or at least pseudo-breakdown.
Well, she did get a beatdown from her former sisterhood, so she has lost before.
I like your optimism but if Bandit did get hit like that I really don’t think Syr’nj can fix that with a bandage. There’s too many organs that would have been slashed in half let alone the damage to the spine. I hope you’re right though and we don’t have to lose them all.
Well… lungs, pancreas, liver… with the lungs and loss of arms the most critical at the moment. Didn’t really look like it’d have hit the spine itself, TBH, especially considering gnome-size.
I am just amazed by our new artist! Excellent work thus far, worried I will not be anymore!
That really wasn’t much of a stand up fight though, which is what she’s used to.
Yeah, John, you’re officially totally awesome.
It’s official because I said so.
That look on her face, she’s shocked by the forest of arrows behind him that all missed, and now the archers are reloading.
Give him a sed-a-give!
I didn’t know the “nj” stood for NINJA.
She fought with Syr’njutsu.
I have to say, this is a beautifully done action comic.
Spoiler: This is all a dream. Byron is still unconscious from that spear-stab, and he’s just dreaming about what would happen if he lost control.
That’s why there’s no background.
optimist. Get on the bandwagon with everyone else!
There hasn’t been a background since before Byron got a spear through him.
That’ll be because action shots are particularly difficult to draw. Dynamic movement takes up a lot more art time than simple walking and talking and faces. Your artist has a time budget for each strip, and if the characters are harder to draw, there’s less time for backgrounds.
You see this a lot in comics that come out on a regular timescale. – You can get away more with the lack of background when the eye is drawn to the action, most of your readers won’t even notice the lack of background when you’re killing off main characters. :)
oh, this isn’t to demean the artwork, I think it’s a sensible and efficient use of time. It’s much more important that the dynamic action looks exactly right than it is to draw detailed textures of the sand on the floor of the arena.
So… Syr’nj survives
I love this comic. SO much.
I love the writing. The art. The storylines. The alt-text.
I also especially love: THE PEOPLE WHO COMMENT. Your puns make me groan halfway across the world and I love you guys for it.
Safe! For the time being at least, there’s still the problem of those archers about to pincushion poor Syr. D:
COLONEL PORNSTACHE TO THE RESCUE! Watch in suspense as he knocks at the arena door and suggestively asks if they need some “pipes fixed”. Cheer as the savage races flee from lecherous advances and awkwardly arousing music! And close your eyes in suspense as Colonel Pornstache, sweating nervously, shoots a round into Harki’s face… From a loaded crossbow!
Harki better watch out. I’m afraid Colonel Pornstache has the rapid reload feat. He may even have manyshot.
With double penetration action!
No. Just a Super Soaker full of egg whites.
(yay for obscure references)
OK, in reality it’s Payet Best wet dream, right?
Situation: Critical. Evacuation: Impossible. Commencing triage….BANDIT: Expectant. Probably will not survive without immediate care, but doing so will divert resources needed elsewhere. GRAVEDUST: Expectant., last priority — less immediate combat capability. FRIGG: Minimal. Walking wounded, may be able to apply self-help. BYRON: Immediate. Abdominal trauma, plus probable circulatory system collapse following abrupt end of beserker state. May swap classification with BANDIT if determined to be beyond available resources.
lol called it total knock out!
Must be patient. Midnight will come soon enough….patience…..
Syr’nj: I’ll just be taking THIS with me.
I think Syr’ may have won. The chieftan was the leader because he was the most powerful in combat, if the disbelief from the other troll in the last page is any indication. He wasn’t able to stop Byron, but she was. Could that be a bargening chip?
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