FB: The stages of grief: denial, depression, bargaining, anger, and performing for a mass audience and pretending everything is fine.

FB comment: Every clown needs a true friend they can let see behind the grease paint (Justin Raderson)

Byron feels the need to apologize to Scipio and E-Merl for everything the berserker put them through, just like recovering alcoholics (and various other repenters) take ownership of what they did under the influence. And like those repenters, he’s a little worried whether that apology will be accepted. This just goes to show how much Byron and E-Merl have drifted apart since they served together. As Syr’Nj could have told Byron, for all its horror, the berserkalypse was barely even a scratch on E-Merl’s psyche compared to the gaping wound that was the loss of Rachel.