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New Comics Every M/W/F - Written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip

The cigar doesn't want him telling people they met on OKCupid.

Ask An Adventurer – Blowing Smoke

on August 9, 2014
Chapter: Ask An Adventurer
└ Tags: Scipio
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Discussion (35) ¬

  1. Wylf
    Wylf
    August 9, 2014, 12:23 am | # | Reply

    To be fair, that is a rather stupid question.

    • Ein the Superdoge!
      Ein the Superdoge!
      August 9, 2014, 12:36 am | # | Reply

      That look of contempt in panel 3 tho.

    • Acadian Bacon
      Acadian Bacon
      August 9, 2014, 12:38 am | # | Reply

      Agreed. If they’d asked about that unique-looking sword he wields, I’d have been interested. c:

      • Sestror
        Sestror
        August 9, 2014, 3:33 am | # | Reply

        I rather want to hear the story of his shield first.

        • Acadian Bacon
          Acadian Bacon
          August 9, 2014, 12:29 pm | # | Reply

          I think it’s just his sigil he put on it though.

        • Timelost
          Timelost
          August 10, 2014, 7:18 pm | # | Reply

          I’m pretty sure it’s because his name means scorpion.

    • Chantelune
      Chantelune
      August 9, 2014, 4:28 am | # | Reply

      Of course it is ! He should have asked the Cigar where he found such a kick-ass human as a host ! (and loved the alt comment, by the way. XD )

  2. LockeZ
    LockeZ
    August 9, 2014, 12:38 am | # | Reply

    Scipio is scertainly scuccinsct.

  3. Ganurath
    Ganurath
    August 9, 2014, 1:25 am | # | Reply

    I’m reminded of what happens when my parents buy an unfamiliar snack. My dad will insist that the snack is an acquired taste, and that none of us would be able to enjoy it. That our taking him at his word results in more for himself is a coincidence. I think Scipio is doing something similar with his cigars.

    Tim: “Hey, Scip, where can I get some of your cigar stash?”
    Scip: “…Someplace vague and unhelpful.”

    • Acrox
      Acrox
      August 9, 2014, 6:20 am | # | Reply

      What he expected, that it was some custom-crafted cigar made by the puffing priests costing 400 gold a piece?

      • Chris
        Chris
        August 11, 2014, 9:36 am | # | Reply

        Or that it is the leafed ashes of an elder dragon he rolled with the fine parchment of a blessing spell.

  4. Locke
    Locke
    August 9, 2014, 2:13 am | # | Reply

    Scipio is angry because you implied smoking is cool. It’s not. It’s a horrible addiction he suffers under every day. Eventually we’ll see panels of him, shaking, reaching for one more cigar, his self-confidence shattered. Byron and co. will find him in a gutter, covered in cigar butts, weeping, and the next arc will be them staging an intervention.

    • Fenlander
      Fenlander
      August 9, 2014, 2:28 am | # | Reply

      Not even the pained look Fr’Nj gives him every morning when he sits of the edge of the bed coughing violently until he gets the first cigar of the day lit is enough to make him quit.

      • Acrox
        Acrox
        August 9, 2014, 6:53 pm | # | Reply

        So… burning and inhaling plants is part of the cicle of life?

        • laughingsnarl
          laughingsnarl
          August 10, 2014, 12:15 am | # | Reply

          yes, after all that ash has to go SOMEWHERE…

          • CinnamonArcher
            CinnamonArcher
            August 12, 2014, 3:54 am | # | Reply

            A severe amount of Snark detected…

    • Joe
      Joe
      August 10, 2014, 11:27 pm | # | Reply

      Nah, he figures it’s okay because a smoker’s life expectancy is longer than an adventurer’s life expectancy. The cancer won’t get him because the Infinite Dragonflight will get there first.

    • Guesticus
      Guesticus
      August 11, 2014, 9:31 am | # | Reply

      You and all the other holier-than-rancid-shit anti-smoke fuckers can just fuck off and burn

      • riotllama
        riotllama
        August 12, 2014, 12:14 pm | # | Reply

        The point is that we won’t be burning and wish you wouldn’t either.

      • Borg
        Borg
        April 23, 2017, 9:32 pm | # | Reply

        . . . Did thou just call thouself “rancid shit”?

  5. Dave
    Dave
    August 9, 2014, 3:18 am | # | Reply

    But WHICH store?!

    WHICH STORE?!

    STOP HOLDING BACK THE GOODS YOU MONSTER!

    XD

  6. WriterX
    WriterX
    August 9, 2014, 3:30 am | # | Reply

    The Alt-Text speaks the truth!

  7. Zblackgoat
    Zblackgoat
    August 9, 2014, 3:53 am | # | Reply

    I once met a cigar on OKCupid. It did not end well.

    • Fenlander
      Fenlander
      August 9, 2014, 4:00 am | # | Reply

      did the relationship leave a bitter taste in your mouth?

      • Kennerly
        Kennerly
        August 9, 2014, 11:15 am | # | Reply

        Monica Lewinsky is that you?

      • Seggs
        Seggs
        August 9, 2014, 11:55 am | # | Reply

        the cigar couldnt say two full sentences without lying to make itself look good. it was all smoke and mirrors

    • MidnightDStroyer
      MidnightDStroyer
      February 18, 2017, 5:06 pm | # | Reply

      The relationship started well, got hot-n-heavy quickly, but the intensity merely fanned the flame into a coal. The relationship burned out & turned to ash.

  8. nemui
    nemui
    August 9, 2014, 5:44 am | # | Reply

    Dat pinky! So sharp! *swoons*

  9. Kennerly
    Kennerly
    August 9, 2014, 11:13 am | # | Reply

    Its call The Store. It is the only store.

    • Tsapki
      Tsapki
      August 10, 2014, 3:47 pm | # | Reply

      During his gladiator days, it was not a thumb from some noble that was the most deadly digit. Many a man died the Scorpions smallest stinger.

      • Tsapki
        Tsapki
        August 10, 2014, 3:49 pm | # | Reply

        Gah, meant this for the comment. Got to stop commenting on a phone.

  10. rvbdonut
    rvbdonut
    August 9, 2014, 12:18 pm | # | Reply

    But WHERE IS THE STORE? I keep looking for it!

    • Chris
      Chris
      August 11, 2014, 9:38 am | # | Reply

      ctrl + M

  11. TBeckett
    TBeckett
    August 9, 2014, 12:25 pm | # | Reply

    And our hopes for a cigar backstory went up in smoke . . .

  12. Talewinds
    Talewinds
    August 10, 2014, 3:01 am | # | Reply

    Scipio is annoyed that his stogie is the butt of a bad joke.

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Guilded Age is co-written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn, and illustrated by John Waltrip. Site design by Samantha Kyle. Fonts by Blambot.com.
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