New Comics Every Weekday - Written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip
Nice Gastonian trollface. :P
This duel isn’t finished Picard! 10 paces, draw your sword, and fling.
Very well you do-gooder nincompoop, ready thyself for a thorough thrashing.
Well that was silly.
Weapons like say… Flying Machines?
Alliterative documents are greatly suspicious!!!
Not to Gnomes.
To a Gnome, advances in alliteration are ALWAYS to be applauded!
(That’s why no-one asked any questions).
It’s unresolved as to why this is the case. Gnome psychologists refer to it as the Wonderously Wierd Word theorem.
Huh. I heard it as the Crippling Capitalized Caption Conundrum.
Nah, That’s A Human Condition, Particularly Common Among Commenters.
Elegant exposition our ever endearing Bandit has expressed.
Aw man, Gnomes were gonna be in the financially secure till Bandit burned through all the ink.
As opposed to non-war weapons. Nerf guns and suchlike.
I think it’s more the difference between weapons and war weapons.
You can make say, a gun, or you can make lots of guns to sell to a side. or both sides. It’s not your business what one does with a gun!
But when you say, make a fleet of flying machines, well, that’s more directly for war.
But I think the problem here, especially if they are indeed selling to both sides, is that this might be a conspiracy not just to profit from war, but to ensure war either A: goes on as long as possible B: There’s always another one coming, or C: Both. “Perpetual Prosperity” and “War” tend to have ugly consequences when used together.
A fishing harpoon isn’t for war.
Technically a fishing harpoon isn’t a weapon, either. It’s a tool. It just happens to be great when used like a weapon.
All weapons are tools; weapons are a subset of tools whose purpose is hurting people.
I carry a pocketknife. It isn’t a weapon. I use it to open packages and slice my bread.
Depends on what you mean as “weapon”. I, raised by Arthas to Scourge the living, am a “weapon”.
True. As has often been stated, almost anything can be used as a weapon. That said, there are particular things that either lend themselves to weaponisation, or are only useful as weapons. Among this category, the most important difference is a question of scale. For example, it’s probably not a great idea to sell handguns to North Korea. It’s a really bad idea to sell nuclear weapons to North Korea. No-one especially cares if you sell teaspoons to North Korea. Technically all may be used as weapons, but only two are dedicated weapons, and only one is capable of large scale havoc.
Actually, there aren’t any weapons that you can’t use for other things. Or at least that you can’t mis-use for other things :)
I take that as a challenge. How about bio weapons?
Depends on the bio-weapon. Name a few specific ones.
no need for specifics ^^ no-one said anything about setting them off… I bet those things make great paperweights, or, if they are bigger, side tables! you can not easily have too many side tables (because, if you do, you build a new layer of them o.o till it’s tables all the way down… (and on the side))
Just how small is your bread, or how large is your pocketknife?
Why, Pocket sized of course
They didn’t back up their parchment? They deserve to have their scrolls burned if they didn’t have backups for it.
Copy? Copy! Sir there was no copy! Making a copy is like fitting wheels to a tomato: time-consuming and completely unnecessary.
Until someone burns your paper, or you want a tomato that harvests itself.
What of a tomato that senses an oncoming crash and ejects itself from the car to save itself from danger?
“How could you miss?”
Bartleby handled backups. But it didn’t turn out well.
Weapons for sky-high ambitions? I wonder if bandit is just telling tall tales and really did get a prominent sum for her actions.
Presumably they did have backups, and quite possibly, having looked at the document, this is the reason she recognized the horn as being Gnomish in spite of the vast degree of variation in Gnomish inventions.
Naw. Even greatly varying designs can carry the metaphorical fingerprints of their creators. I’d bet gnomish designs tend towards many small fiddly smooth parts. I’ll bet gnomes like making things of brass more than goblins do, too. And they may be more ready to aim for abstractions and indirect action, as well.
She was not certain it was gnomish make, but she had a strong feeling about it; material, construction, and even purpose might be enough to convince her of that.
That bearded wizard dude. I can’t tell if he’s a gnome or a dwarf to be totally honest.
I don’t even know if there IS a difference between gnomes and dwarves in this world.
Gnomes are about a foot shorter and two feet narrower.
And dwarves way a ton more and can step in bear traps without loosing their feet? I guess dwarves are mostly “more tougher” and independent. Which is pretty in check with typical modern high fantasy, no?
I don’t get that joke the alt text was spouting. I really don’t.
That’s OK. Don’t let the gravitas get you down.
1) You’d think a culture that values the scientific process would have a system in place to archive and store it’s work. Maybe they were fed up with PC LOAD LETTER errors and scrapped the gnomish version of a photocopier.
2) These must be some serious weapons if Bandit, who bragged about gnomes inventing “like forty flying machines” to the sky elves, felt they needed to be scrapped. Are these the flying machine plans they so proudly displayed before?
3) If these weapons are truly game-changing, it appears the Gastonian Council had at some point changed it’s position about appearing to advance “too quickly” and provoke aggression. If that’s not the case then these weapons are either easily hidden like a doomsday device, or they’re a quantum leap that removes the need to keep a low profile.
4) Another possibility is that the Gastonian military is acting independently from the Council. And even more juicy, Bandit might have only recently destroyed those plans under a “Peacekeeping” directive from Ardaic, in an effort to prevent that “Unity Against Gastonia” scenario the Council was so worried about. Would Ardaic order those plans destroyed after he made a presentation on it?
Treason? Politics? Espionage? Doom? Sexyness? Moustaches?
Alt-text is incorrect. You CAN apply gravitas to inconsequential stuff
Admittedly, a clip from an anime is hardly proof, but the clip amuses me.
Before I clicked the link, I was CERTAIN it was going to be Light eating a potato chip.
This would be a better example.
I want to play too:
Manacles. For children.
You know, I just can’t seem to take it that Bandit’s telling the whole truth.
I’m reminded of the strip in Order of the Stick where we find out that Haley Starshine wasn’t just greedy, but was actually collecting money for her father’s ransom.
And then it is promptly revealed that she’s also greedy. The ransom note is more of an excuse than a cause.
Hewie, Pyre, and Bandit. Gnomes must take a bit of pride in what they do for a living.
I bet the bartender’s named Barty.
No, it’s Suds.
A vast resource for gnomish names!
Ah! yes, also; hello everyone.
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