Chapter 3 – Page 5
New Comics Every Weekday - Written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip
Guilded Age
Fantasy Comics every Weekday.
Philly Comic Con
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(Hartford, CT 7/12 - 7/14)
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(Rockville, MD 8/23 - 8/25)
The second rule is, you do not talk about the burlap sack.
3rd RULE: If someone says “stop” or goes limp, it is nothing to worry about.
4th RULE: Only three guys to a burlap sack.
5th RULE: One burlap sack at a time.
6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes, no poor kids, no cries for help and no guardsmen.
7th RULE: The games will go on as long as they have to.
8th RULE: If this is your first time in the burlap sack , you HAVE to enter it.
You don’t ask questions.
And then you just lost the game…
DAMNYOU!!!!!!
Children. Their stupidity hurdles even the boundaries of art.
Serves the little snots right. I’m not sure what they did, if anything, but I’m certain that they deserve whatever terribly funny fate awaits them.
Back in MY day, my parents made sure I didn’t go with strangers the only way that worked. They beat the idiot out of me with a stick. And look how I turned out. A pillar of society!
Stop talking. Please.
I think the rich guy in panel one was just on The Daily Show With Jon Stewart unironically protesting against civil rights for homosexuals.
Frigg has the right idea- not only is there a huge bowl of pickled trilobites for chowin’ down on, she also gets to make snooty rich people Make A Face. It’s a win all around!
They look more like pickled phyllocarids to me. Or perhaps, you know, shrimp.
…I’m an invertebrate palaeobiologist.
…Awesome. I was gonna go with “pickled anomalocaris”, but I couldn’t remember off the top of my head what the plural was, and more people have heard of trilobites anyway. Which is terrible, because anomalocarids were some of the coolest things that ever existed.
Hey, now we know who ordered the seafood platter.
….. Alright then, think that counts as “Too stupid to live”…., even for kids.
No my friend. That is the nobility for you.
Phesant children at least have the common curtsey to fight over the piece of cheese you throw into the sack.
Noble children just whine that it wasn’t cake.
Damn nobility…
I would have to agree … any child stupid enough to pile into a burlap sack with a bunch of smelly children is probably not worth the expense of rescue. Natural selection is at work.
A party game, eh? And just who was throwing the party?
Remember kids, if you’re not at a party, party games are immediately suspect…
Granted, this is a humour comic and all, but I’m a little surprised at all the “stupid kids deserved to be kidnapped” comments. They’re kids. And kidnapping is a crime regardless of the intelligence of the victim.
Kids suck.
Dude what is your beef?
Did a baby steal your candy?
Yes. And one day I will exact my terrible revenge.
I have to agree, Michael. If anyone should be blamed(other than the kidnappers, of course) it’s the parents. If you know your kid is either that stupid or that young, then you are responsible for watching them, or at least making certain they are watched. Note that I am not in favor of the overprotective coddling that many parents practice; I’m just saying that you need to know what level of supervision your kids need.
If it is a Magic burlap sack of holding and child ensnaring, with optional parental/guardian distraction field, then the blame falls entirely on the kidnappers, and the parents can be excused =)
Also, why did all of the boys want a tiara? Is the goal of the game to pick the pretty, pretty princess? I find it funny that it was the girl who was smart enough not to fall for it.
Clearly it’s a manly tiara. A manly tiara of manliness.
Alternatively, to give to a girl.
Unfortunately, most parents back in the dark ages/medieval period were less than attentive and left the raising of children to servants. Often resentful and/or neglectful servants. Hmmm….I wouldn’t be surprised if the pirates had paid one of them to “look the other way”.
Subject change: I don’t see Bandit anywhere. Quick, check the silverware! (That could be a new motto.)
Perhaps the kids are simply naive. They might just think that pirates are as friendly as everyone else they see everyday, it’s the only thing they’ve been exposed to.
I also speculate that the boys’ may not even know what a pirate is(although this doesn’t change the fact that every boy wants to be a pirate/ninja/both).
Plus, while Blond Bard is simply bragging to the populace, the real adventurers are gathering info. And he thinks /they’re/ the coat-tail riders. Or he will.
Upside to the stupidity: You may be able to charge more for a rescue mission that averts natural selection.
Also: How the hell didn’t anyone else notice pirates stuffing children into a burlap sack!?! On the street?!?
Pirates can be very sociable, it’s not all random gun shots, drinking, and not-so-random cannon rounds fired at merchant ships.
People are also oblivious to the most blatant things.
Always though Pirates invented the “FREE CANDY!” bit.
Given that most of the animosity in the comic world seems to be directed at non-humans, and the whole world is hovering (apparently) around a medieval level of development, it’s not a far stretch to imagine children believing that human strangers who seem nice and are offering gifts would take the statement at face value.
Also/alternately, the stupidity is intentional to enhance the comedy. I, for one, lol’d.
Also, I’d like to say I feel huge affection for one character in particular, but they’re all just so fantastic. Byron is perhaps my favorite (though I swear the next game I DM is going to have an Expy of Frigg in it somewhere).
How did the kidnappers carry a sack filled with all the little boys? And what counts as little? Are there, like, ten year olds in there?
I mean, are Our Heroes, and also Payet, going to be chasing after thieves who blend right in and are carrying a wee sack o’ holding, or is there going to be a hilarious if brief chase of two burly guys staggering along the main street, griping about how children are heavy?
“Our Heroes, and also Payet”
I love this almost as much as Syr’nj’s face in the second panel.
I remember playing “Everyone had to get in the burlap sack,” when I was little.
That’s nothing. My family was so into that game I was born in a burlap sack. I’ll never forget my shock and disorientation at seeing the sky, trees, streets and buildings for the first time when I entered kindergarten.
Now that’s a sheltered upbringing!
Ba-dump, Pish!
I’d make a list of what we know about children and pirates but this strip is obsolete tommorrow so who cares?
At least we’re almost to figuring this whole In Medias Res line.
“Homer doesn’t begin the Trojan War with Leda’s twin eggs: he always rushes toward the outcome, and he carries the listener along with him into the middle of things, just as if they were familiar.”
— Horace
Wow…. just wow.
I can imagine.
“Hey kid, get in the sack and you’ll get a cool surprise.” Thus the ‘getting-kids-in-a-sack’ fetish was born. And it just got worse from there.
And thus Rule 36 is older than one might think.
These kids look to be about 5-6 years of age. That age believes everything, unless they’ve been taught not to trust. Most of them from privileged homes haven’t. Also, this is the strangest kidnapping ever.