New Comics Every Weekday - Written by T Campbell & Phil Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip
Well, Gr’zl, that’s always the problem when you fan the flames of war.
well he’s really adding too much fuel to this fire if you ask me.
Old name: Gr’zl
New name: S’zl…. or Cinderfella
Down, down, down, in a burnin’ ring of fire
FIRE IN THE HOLD
“Burn, baby !! Burn !!” *starts dancing*
“Fire in the Disco,
Fire in the…
HUDDA HUDDA HUDDA!
Oh no, not Tectonicus! I’d totally forgotten about him!
Oh, that doesn’t look good.
Do not call up that which you cannot put down.
HELLO LADIES. LOOK AT YOUR WOOD ELF. NOW BACK TO ME. NOW BACK TO YOUR WOOD ELF, NOW BACK TO ME. SADLY, HE ISN’T ME, BUT IF HE STOPPED WORSHIPPING LADY-SCENTED DEITIES, HE WOULDN’T BE BURNING TO A CINDER IN THE ALL-CONSUMING FLAMES OF MY WRATH. LOOK DOWN, LOOK UP, WHERE ARE YOU? YOU’RE IN A FOREST CONSUMED BY THE GOD WHOSE SACRED FLAMES YOUR WOOD ELF WAS INCINERATED BY. WHAT’S IN YOUR HAND? I HAVE IT. IT’S THE ARM OF YOUR WOOD ELF GODDESS BEING SACRIFICED TO WAKE ME FROM MY DREAD SLUMBER. THE ELF GODDESS ARM IS NOW A MERE STICK BLAZING IN THE HEAT OF MY TERRIBLE POWER. ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE WHEN YOU WORSHIP THE FIRE LORD OF THE SAVAGE RACES. I’M RISING UP THROUGH THE EARTH.
i think you EARNED a gold star for that one!
Excellence in its purest form right here. Mordecai wins the internet for today.
Do… do you have a brand of personal care products I can buy?
Define “personal care”.
Though I bet he sells space heaters, carbon paper, and charcoal :3
What’s that burning in the distance? It’s a stadium filled with all the world’s performers of That Thing You Hate.
Platinum star maybe?
I don’t know if you can make a star out of slowclaps, but I’m willing to try for that.
How about an actual star? I’ll pick one for you and call it Gravedust.
‘Cos it’s a white dwarf.
Well, it seems some assume the elf was burned by tectonicus’ flame. Actually, as Tectonicus was not yet summonded, this shouldn’t be the case. And if you look at panel 1, you’ll see some kind of grenads flying, and on panel 2 one is exploding. Sorry, no flame from heaven (or hell or whatever Tectonicus’ place is), just plain war technology.
A. Tectonicus is a fire god. Safe to say he considers any fire his fire, even if he wasn’t personally engaged in its creation in a given instance.
B. It’s a joke, and a call back to all the “auldspices” jokes in the comments when Gr’zl first made his appearance. Sperg less.
Hey now, that ain’t right. We don’t cotton to that kind of language around these parts.
*sigh* Apologies for my overly enthusiastic white knighting coworker. I’ll talk to him.
It’s cool, we just don’t get down with hatespeak around here.
As an autistic person, this is the first time I’ve encountered this slang.
Thank you for saying something about it, Phil.
-sighs- It is at this time that I truly lament my lack of bardic skills to compose a homage of One-Winged Angel in Tectonicus’ honor.
The English translation shows that the meaning is surprisingly fitting for Tectonicus:
with violent anger
with violent anger
Fate – monstrous
Fate – monstrous
Come, come, O come, (Glorious,)
Do not let me die (Noble)…”
The only changes I’d make (alas, if only I knew more than a speck of Latin) would be to (a) shorten the lines before the name by one syllable, to make room for Tectonicus being one syllable longer than Sephiroth; and (b) Maybe change ‘Do not let me die’. It seems kind of out of place with Tectonicus, who’s not an angel but a destroyer (well, although he does create ash and fertile soil…)
well now, looks like the bad guys never learn about summoning up what they can’t control. i will laugh so hard if they do summon that monster and it turns on THEM and not burn the elves.
i mean, when they summoned ragnaros up, it did not turn out well for the dark iron dwarfs either.
TOO SOON, HARKY!
Huh, actually I forgot, but didn’t the Dark Iron Dwarfs summon Ragnaros by accident? My Warcraft lore isn’t great but my understanding was that the Dark Iron Dwarfs were losing the War of Three Hammers against the Ironforge and Wildhammer Dwarfs and tried a desperate spell to try and win the war…and ending up tearing Ragnaros from the Elemental Planes in the botched process.
you’re close, the dark iron dwarfs did summon Ragnaros in thinking they could swing a deal with him or at least aim his rampage at their foes. well it failed badly. the result was the burning stepps and searing gordge zones.
Oh, things look bad for the home team, folks…
Tectonicus fumed, “I SO hate,
My fine china”, as his meal he ate
“The dishes all snap
And then overlap
Just because they’re Tectonic plates!”
good one. i smiled.
Tectonicus: “Yeah…about that. You’re not really my children. At the Mayan Calendar party your mother and I went to…well, I had one soul too many, and passed out…”
Hm…did it again. I guess session cookies aren’t getting cleared in my browser.
Some like it hot?
I figure only gravy and frigg-fragg have the dam(n)age output to even annoy that thing…
But Syr obviously plans to do science to it, so I guess annoying it will be useful too.
“Some people just want to watch the world burn.”
“and their plan is simple… they kill the elves.”
“its not about killing the elves, its about sending a message”
That message being “Die”
When life gives you Tectonicus, make Tectonicuscous.
Tectonicus: BY YOUR POWERS COMBINED, I AM… WELL, JUST FIRE, REALLY! ::::)
Thank you. That’s the first thing I thought of looking at panel 4.
we DID start the fire, it was always burning.
Why is Tectonicus the god of fire and not earthquakes?
Might be. We dunno.
Kinda both. More detail about Tectonicus to come in later pages!
Because Dubsteponicus and Technonicus were already fighting over that title.
As it reads in his autobiography “Magma Carter”, he’s not just about the movement of the plates, he’s even more about the red hotness that makes them plates move.
Did I miss the glass slipper and pumpkin coach?
STOP HAVING MY GRAVATAR.
Ha. What. Bravo
Dagnabbit… that was supposed to be a reply to biggmac
Why thanks! *blushes*
The flow is getting a bit confusing, but is that Penk that Byron just kicked off that Rhinosaur? It looks like Byron just eviscerated the guy that was giving him orders a few pages ago. Maybe I’m just reading too much into things
It is not Penk.
If you’re ever unsure of character names, just check the tags.
do auraugu and tectonicus get tags for this page?
Yes, Auraugu should have gotten a tag. Tectonicus will not. Yet.
IT’S A PUPPET.
yet? (thoughts go wild with possablity) did you just tip your hand Mr. Phil? or is Tectonicus not going to make a full appeance just yet?
He hasn’t made what I’d consider a full appearance on this page. Hence no tags.
That’s all I’ll tell you.
does tectonicus’ forehead get a tag for this page?
Looks like he has stop and drop down, but will he remember to roll?
My god! Why did we pick today to ban those damned water pistols!?
Because SOMEBODY kept filling them with ranch dressing.
I’m not going to name names, but they know who they are. And they have only themselves to blame.
It wasn’t me! I filled *mine* with BBQ SAUCE! (mmmmyummy)
I fill my water pistols with K-Y and superglue.
Gr’Zl… damn it. I had things to ask you. You have more experience with courting Wood Elves than I. Is a topiary in bad taste as a gift? What’s with all that sap, is that stuff safe? Is this rash normal?
All you need to know is that her bark is worse than her bite.
I’m so mad…I just finished reading through 3 years worth of webcomic in two months (Slowwwwly enjoying it) and now I get to this latest page only to find I missed the 3 year anniversary page?! Last week! T_____T
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