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Annotations Every Day - Written by T Campbell & Flo Kahn - Illustrated by John & Jason Waltrip

'Instead of WOOD ELVES they should be called WOULD ELVES. As in, WOULD ELVES just get with the program already?!'

Chapter 7 – Page 8

on September 24, 2010
Chapter: Chapter 07
└ Tags: Bandit, Embraisch'Nj, Gravedust
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Discussion (73) ¬

    • Twitted by Theoreticalgamr
      September 24, 2010, 12:31 am | #
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      November 18, 2010, 9:36 pm | #
  1. Joe
    Joe
    September 24, 2010, 12:03 am | # | Reply

    And what’s the deal with that airship food?

    • 1d4caltrop
      1d4caltrop
      September 24, 2010, 12:09 am | # | Reply

      Oh wow…*LOL* Brought up the page, left for a few minutes, came back and posted a comment before refreshing. You beat me to the punchline.

  2. 1d4caltrop
    1d4caltrop
    September 24, 2010, 12:07 am | # | Reply

    “And what’s the deal with airship food?“

    • 1d4caltrop
      1d4caltrop
      September 24, 2010, 12:11 am | # | Reply

      1d4caltrop is derp. Derp de derp.

    • 1d4caltrop
      1d4caltrop
      September 24, 2010, 12:30 am | # | Reply

      I would also like to take a moment to note, for the record, that I am not, repeat NOT, Carlos Mencia, though I can understand how one might reasonably reach that conclusion given the present circumstances.

      • Mic-Gold
        Mic-Gold
        September 24, 2010, 4:49 pm | # | Reply

        I SO know where you got your name! Those things suck to step on!

  3. kagato23
    kagato23
    September 24, 2010, 12:18 am | # | Reply

    See, Humans eat like this.

    Wood elves eat like thisssss.

  4. schtroumpf
    schtroumpf
    September 24, 2010, 12:26 am | # | Reply

    Baby steps, Gravedust. Fifty years previous, comedians like this guy could only get work if they performed in woodface, as humans did in their “wandering minstrelsy” shows.

    • Doop doop
      Doop doop
      September 24, 2010, 4:00 am | # | Reply

      Actually, the first thing that came to mind reading this comic (other than, fuuuuck, Syr’nj is gonna get racisted hard) was Otto von Chriek from Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series. He’s a vampire.

      In “Thud!” Vimes, commander of the Watch, has a ton of protesters at the idea that the Watch might hire a vampire. But Otto, a camerman for the Times, is just there hanging out and taking pictures. Paraphrased, Vimes asks “They don’t seem to protest against you” and Otto replies “Well, I make them laugh.”

      Pratchett then goes on to have Vimes theorize that if people are afraid of you, if you need to integrate into society, it’s better to come off as foppish and silly then feared. And as we’ve seen, people seem to not like wood elves all that much.

      • TexasNinjaBuzzard
        TexasNinjaBuzzard
        September 24, 2010, 6:50 am | # | Reply

        It certainly got Little Richard plenty of tail in the ’50s; he acted like a big ol’ fruitcake onstage, and as a result angry racist rednecks didn’t pay much attention to him hanging out with their daughters.

        …This guy is clearly a douche, though. He steppin’ an’-a fetchin’ so’s massa let him stay in de house. Unless he turns out to be some kind of undercover spy for the Hidden Taproot Brotherhood or something, he’s sellin’ out like icewater on the Devil’s back porch.

        • barsukthom
          barsukthom
          September 24, 2010, 4:44 pm | # | Reply

          I wonder if he’s actually Best’s daddy?

          • Little Richard
            Little Richard
            September 24, 2010, 7:12 pm | # | Reply

            Son, I am disappoint.

          • Zizek
            Zizek
            September 25, 2010, 1:49 pm | # | Reply

            Huh, that would actually be excellent characterisation.

            • Zizek
              Zizek
              September 25, 2010, 1:52 pm | # | Reply

              Although I guess kind of overly convenient.

  5. VexingVision
    VexingVision
    September 24, 2010, 12:26 am | # | Reply

    I was trying to come up with a clever “would a wood elf would some wood” kind of thing, but Bandit’s wood is distracting me.

    • BarGamer
      BarGamer
      September 24, 2010, 2:14 am | # | Reply

      Bandit IS cute like this. Personally, I would have gone with a different color stone for her necklace, but it frames her head very nicely, and the blue(?) dress works well with her skin tone. All she needs now are some tiny diamond earrings or something, and she’s ready for a night at the opera!

      • VexingVision
        VexingVision
        September 24, 2010, 4:54 am | # | Reply

        Yeah, I find that Bandit in a dress is so much more gorgeous than in that swimsuit issue.

      • Aboulic
        Aboulic
        September 24, 2010, 4:24 pm | # | Reply

        on the colour of the stone, i think we should bear in mind that Bandit may not have had a chance to see what it looks like on her. I have a hunch that there’s a woman in a seat in front of them that still thinks she owns a necklace.

        at intermission….”it must have fallen off some where around here… it looks almost exactly like the one on that little girl with the slightly pointy ears”

      • Carl-E
        Carl-E
        September 25, 2010, 10:51 am | # | Reply

        Thieves don’t wear earrings. They know just how easy they are to take…

    • Cote
      Cote
      September 24, 2010, 12:39 pm | # | Reply

      My first thought at this comic was: “Bandit all dolled up? Heart.” Glad to hear I wasn’t alone.

      Cheers,

      Cote

      • Jim
        Jim
        September 24, 2010, 11:40 pm | # | Reply

        Definitely not alone. Y’all can continue the comic without her, I’m taking her with me.

        • Sortelli
          Sortelli
          September 26, 2010, 1:32 pm | # | Reply

          Don’t bogart the Bandit dude

  6. Carapace
    Carapace
    September 24, 2010, 2:06 am | # | Reply

    Elves here live a long blinkin’ time, right? So maybe this does seem like crazy progress to them. “Great Ash! Was there a city there yesterday? And now we’re giving substandard racial comedy performances? How far we have all come!”

  7. SaltyKracka
    SaltyKracka
    September 24, 2010, 2:39 am | # | Reply

    Hmmm…High society Bandit.

    Methinks me likes it.

    • ahdok
      ahdok
      September 24, 2010, 3:47 am | # | Reply

      Bandit looks absolutely beautiful. We need excuses to dress her like this all the time.

      • barsukthom
        barsukthom
        September 24, 2010, 4:45 pm | # | Reply

        “Bandit’s Dream Party!” With “Realistic lockpicks!”

  8. Mordecai
    Mordecai
    September 24, 2010, 3:06 am | # | Reply

    So the weirdly prosaic and unfunny comedy is perhaps the first part of this comic to strain my suspension of disbelief. I wonder what that reaction implies.

    • Sybarite
      Sybarite
      September 30, 2010, 2:28 am | # | Reply

      I have the same reaction to Seinfeld.

  9. justmoi
    justmoi
    September 24, 2010, 3:07 am | # | Reply

    In Gastonia, nature eats you!

  10. Guy
    Guy
    September 24, 2010, 3:18 am | # | Reply

    Bandit dressed up? …or at least in an upwards direction.

    But anyway, what’s the deal with observational comedy?

    • ahdok
      ahdok
      September 24, 2010, 3:48 am | # | Reply

      Good to see that Gravedust dressed up too. :p

  11. Atnas
    Atnas
    September 24, 2010, 3:43 am | # | Reply

    Hey, she looks like a lady!

    • barsukthom
      barsukthom
      September 24, 2010, 4:46 pm | # | Reply

      Gnome looks like a lady!

  12. ahdok
    ahdok
    September 24, 2010, 3:50 am | # | Reply

    For a moment when I loaded up the page I thought that I’d managed to miss several updates and that either 1) something really weird had happened to either Syrnj, or that 2) something really weird had happened to Best. Then I thought maybe this guy was their collective son.

    • ahdok
      ahdok
      September 24, 2010, 3:51 am | # | Reply

      Heeeyyyy… this isn’t opera!

      • Locke
        Locke
        September 26, 2010, 6:43 pm | # | Reply

        What the… You’re right, he said “opera” and this is clearly NOT an opera.

    • G@T0R
      G@T0R
      September 24, 2010, 8:59 am | # | Reply

      Do all elves look the same to you… You sir, are a bigot. :-)

  13. Hawk
    Hawk
    September 24, 2010, 7:53 am | # | Reply

    I read the comic, read the comments, and went back and read the comic again going…”Gravy dressed up?”

    Then I went back to admiring how gorgeous Bandit looks!! And trying to devise if I can imitate that in a scaled down costume.

    …there’s nothing wrong with imagining a GA Cosplay. Nothing at all….

  14. Bakamoichigei
    Bakamoichigei
    September 24, 2010, 11:04 am | # | Reply

    All I could think was “Where’d Bandit steal that outfit?” hehe.

    • dr pepper
      dr pepper
      September 24, 2010, 4:31 pm | # | Reply

      I was thinking “Where’d Bandit steal those breasts?” Cause i doubt she’d agree to wear a corset or anything else that would restrict her movement.

      • Korbl
        Korbl
        September 24, 2010, 11:07 pm | # | Reply

        I’d imagine that she binds her chest when in her leather armour for reasons of mobility and the fact that breasts are a great way to get noticed, something she probably doesn’t want most of the time. They’d also get in the way at times.

        • ahdok
          ahdok
          September 25, 2010, 5:16 pm | # | Reply

          If you’re looking at the boobs… hey is this your wallet?

  15. DCB
    DCB
    September 24, 2010, 11:07 am | # | Reply

    I’d imagine Bandit doesn’t need much of an excuse to have an expansive wardrobe, after all best way to disappear into the herd is to look like you fit in. Not to mention it’s amazing enough to swipe something out from a crowds nose, it’s all the more amazing when you do it in a dress and heels.

  16. Jean-Luc
    Jean-Luc
    September 24, 2010, 11:51 am | # | Reply

    Simply awesome.

  17. TraderInTown
    TraderInTown
    September 24, 2010, 1:11 pm | # | Reply

    Ba-dum, pish!

  18. Caliban
    Caliban
    September 24, 2010, 2:57 pm | # | Reply

    Bandit looks really cute, but my first impression was “what happened to her neck?” – it seems 2-3 times longer than it normally is.

    • Hawk
      Hawk
      September 24, 2010, 4:27 pm | # | Reply

      I think it’s how she has her hair done. Also possibly a change in posture – surely she knows how to alter such things as stance and posture, being such an experienced con artist.

      *ahem* Manipulation expert, that is.

    • Jean-Luc
      Jean-Luc
      September 24, 2010, 9:32 pm | # | Reply

      She’s stretching it to reach GD’s ear (whisper mode).

  19. Locke
    Locke
    September 24, 2010, 6:21 pm | # | Reply

    So, what do the Shit Elves eat, again? :P

    • Jean-Luc
      Jean-Luc
      September 24, 2010, 9:33 pm | # | Reply

      Sugar and spice.

  20. Blaaargh!111
    Blaaargh!111
    September 24, 2010, 10:06 pm | # | Reply

    Wait. Where’s who going with what? Is bandit talking about the elf’s comedy routine?

  21. Silvermane
    Silvermane
    September 25, 2010, 2:15 am | # | Reply

    …. Bandit is beautiful! I love her so much.

  22. Andras
    Andras
    September 25, 2010, 5:31 pm | # | Reply

    …Abraham Elfon?

  23. khavren
    khavren
    September 26, 2010, 1:41 am | # | Reply

    What, so even though he’s an elf, he’s no longer a wood elf cause he doesn’t live there anymore. is he a Gastonion elf now?

    • Jean-Luc
      Jean-Luc
      September 26, 2010, 8:10 pm | # | Reply

      He’s a human-elf now.

  24. Blogonomicon
    Blogonomicon
    September 26, 2010, 9:38 am | # | Reply

    If Gravedust thinks this guy’s comedy is racially biased, it’s a good thing he doesn’t live in the real world.

    [Non-White Comedian]: All [comedian’s race] people are [stereotype]. White people don’t get it because they’re [inverse of stereotype]. That’s why [related stereotype].

    • Dojang
      Dojang
      September 26, 2010, 8:29 pm | # | Reply

      oh man, and how about [racial steriotype presented as observational humour]? am i right? am i right?

      not sure i entirely agree, and i’m not a purveyor of common american stand-up, but what about chris rock and chappelle? seems like their comedy is basically as described above but with reversed races…?

      • Phil
        Flo
        September 26, 2010, 8:31 pm | # | Reply

        It’s all a matter of taste, IMO.

        • Dojang
          Dojang
          September 26, 2010, 8:45 pm | # | Reply

          i wasn’t making judgement on quality, just subject matter.

    • SotiCoto
      SotiCoto
      January 19, 2015, 3:12 am | # | Reply

      Regarding stand-up comedy from other countries is a pretty good lesson in subjectivity, of course.

      I don’t believe I’ve ever heard a single funny thing (by my reckoning) come out of the mouth of any American stand-up comedian. Not once. All their mannerisms seem exaggerated, and then they say something trite of a somewhat playground level… and then americans laugh.
      It doesn’t seem even remotely funny to me… but americans laugh at it.
      It is much the same with the horrible pun-threads around here. I’m sure americans are probably laughing at it… but I haven’t found anything like that even remotely amusing since before I was 5.

      Different cultural standards… pretty much.

      Not sure if British standards of stand-up comedy are regarded by americans as funny. I mean last I checked, the yanks actually ~like~ us… unlike the way we ~dislike~ them. So who knows how it goes as regards the funnies?

  25. Admiral Squish
    Admiral Squish
    September 26, 2010, 3:17 pm | # | Reply

    is it weird that I find gnomes/halflings are hot?

    Also, I just realized something: To a gnome, all jewelry is twice as big. Modest gems look huge.

    • Sergei Alderman
      Sergei Alderman
      November 7, 2014, 2:33 pm | # | Reply

      Hehe. “Gems”…

  26. taltamir
    taltamir
    November 1, 2010, 11:59 am | # | Reply

    heh, he is funny :)

  27. nonimportante
    nonimportante
    February 26, 2015, 8:29 pm | # | Reply

    bandit boob!!!!

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Guilded Age is co-written by T Campbell & Flo Kahn, and illustrated by John Waltrip. Site design by Samantha Kyle. Fonts by Blambot.com.
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